


friend, please

by orphan_account



Series: peterflash in twenty øne piløts [1]
Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, M/M, No Smut, Panic Attacks, References to Depression, Soft mention of self harm, Teen and Up, depressed flash, semi-happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 12:45:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18152045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: it was a comping mechanism. a way to keep himself shielded, far away from his true thoughts and feelings. with it in place he tried pushing down his thumping heart as it rose into his throat with every breath and gesture peter made, laughing insults from his torn heart as he attempted to brush away how truly petrified and confused he felt.[ title credit: twenty one pilots ]





	friend, please

**Author's Note:**

> uh sorry if this is bad im just really tired and wanted some sad peterflash. probably going to be three chapters, i don’t know how often i will update. 
> 
> warnings for this chapter: soft mention of self harm/abuse (not major) and panic attack
> 
> stay alive and safe my loves.

_“ You say that spiders crawled inside and made themselves a home Where alliance once was Petrified of who you are and who you have become You will hide from everyone, denying you need someone To exterminate your bones “_

_~~ ***** ~~  
_

it was a comping mechanism. a way to keep himself shielded, far away from his true thoughts and feelings. with it in place he tried pushing down his thumping heart as it rose into his throat with every breath and gesture peter made, laughing insults from his torn heart as he attempted to brush away how truly petrified and confused he felt.

he hated himself as he caught that he had fallen in love with the soft caress of peter’s shoulder; how the sun in fourth period shone so proudly off of it, causing the skin to form a soft tan. he despised the way the desperately longed to gracefully trace his mocha fingertips up and down it, treasuring the boys very existence.

peter was beautiful, a work of fine art. his smile radiated of the month of june, everything about him warming up the cold alleyways inside of flash’s heart. he hated the way he treated him, despising every part of himself as he recklessly tormented and insulted the beautiful boy.

he never chose to pay attention to the way parker looked at him in such wonder. he brushed away the way his glimmering eyes traced over him with worry every time he pulled his sleeves down with a both soft and sad orange smile.

on the other hand he utterly and completely failed to notice the look of mellow worry on peter’s face whenever he went days without sleep and left his hair matted and let his black coffee curls run wild against the air. his eyes frequently had deep bags traced underneath them, and peter didn’t fail to notice when the appeared.

as he fell deeper and deeper smitten with the dark blonde haired boy, flash started to fail to take care of himself in any way at all. he stopped caring about what he wore, allowing himself to throw on a worn out sweatshirt and tired jeans every day. he didn’t care as he felt the warm home sleep provided run away from him as he completely loss sense of himself-in fact he encouraged it. he did not deserve it anyways. flash eventually started to lose weight, started the lose sense of himself in a whole.

and this broke peter, tore him to shreds. he constantly worried and pestered flash with questions and concerns as he saw the man’s mental heath drop to an all time low. peter attempted almost everything to make him feel better. he make fun of himself, screwed up on things, said cheesy puns, all the things that usually spiked a reaction from the tan boy. but all he got was compete and utter shattered silence.

flash was like a broken, fogged mirror. something you never care to notice or take attentiveness of, only noticing it even existed when something was wrong with it. he was constantly overlooked by the rest of the world, making himself act like a prat to receive any attention at all. 

he was treated like shit at home, half the time left to his own abusive thoughts and the other half they were thrown at him. he didn’t mind the yelling because it meant that his parents were paying any attention to him at all.

he was worthless, yes, but only to himself and to two people of authority. but oh, was he the world in peter parker’s eyes. 

on a specific sultry tuesday in late june when flash’s untamed, tousled, hair stuck to his deep brown skin with perspiration he paced up to his worn steel locker with his head down, having little to no reaction as he was approached by none other than the one and only thing he longed for: peter.

his heart thumped wildly in his parched throat as he looked over at the young, toned, built young boy. he slammed his locker shut while tugging his backpack over his left shoulder, refusing to make true eye contact. “What do you want?”

peter frowned, his pale skin contrasting against the soft, radiant shine of the sun. 

“are you okay?”

“why wouldn’t I be?” His tone was sharp and defensive.

“im just asking.”

“well don’t, I’m fine.”

peter retracted back into his shell, reluctantly giving the boy what he wished for. he quickly walked away after giving one last attempt buy softly saying “im here if you need me. you have my number.”

flash was left alone, he quickly paced to the bathroom as he placed himself behind the locked door in the furthest stall from the door, pulling his knees to his chest as his beating heart took over all the sounds around him. he hid his face in his hands and choked his sobs with his skin, struggling to breathe and think. he hated this, he hated the way peter made him feel.

it was wrong, all wrong, and peter was the only thing that had even a small chance to make it right.

 


End file.
